The 20's Love. Why It Matters..?

As with coding and management and matters of finance and marketing, relationships have a learning curve. You learn the basics of “relationshiptiva”. How to deal with sexual etiquette, mundane everyday things, scheduling, and appropriate meetings with close friends, and some equitable plan for who’s supposed to pay for dinner or wash the dishes this time. These are basics. And if you’re learning them in your thirties, it’s going to be much harder.

Because in a few years, however young you think yourself (how old is thirty, really?), you will be approaching midlife and you won’t be as adaptable as you once were. There are reasons for this, many of which are biological. Your body won’t respond the same way. You’ll have knee problems that didn’t exist when you were running sophomore track. You can’t stay out till 4:00 a.m. anymore, because now the same alcohol intake has somehow resulted in a hangover that’s a multiple of what it once was — and you will never ever have appreciated a nice soft pillow more. And if you think you can fend these things off with diet and exercise, you should probably buy a good solid book on the aging process or find a professional athlete over the age of thirty to talk to. They will speak of massage therapists and bone density and necessary nutritional supplements. You can mitigate these things, but you can’t entirely avoid them.

Relationships are too important to learn how to face those issues at the last minute. You have to go through a few of them to know how to properly conduct one. You have to fail. You have to date a few terrible people. You have to be the asshole yourself sometimes. You have to learn how not to be the asshole. You have to spend tons of time together — so much time that sometimes you feel indistinguishable from each other and you find that both reassuring and disturbing. You have to have a vicious fight and know it’s not ending you and that you’re going to have to work to repair it and that the effort is worthwhile. These things take time.

Work at a relationship the way you work at your work. Spend the time. Make the effort.

Kya Yahi Pyaar Hai..? :)

Boy - Its feels great when I talk to you, and its great that we are already such good friends.
Girl -  Dammit you have no idea how madly I was waiting for you to call me!

And the story begins, or rather i should say, the eruption of a new volcano is on its way..? ;)

For me, looking at relationships around since years, of people very close to me to people i never thought can date someone, has come to a common end, the Eruption!

Love indeed is a temporary madness, madness to be together, madness of touch, and then the madness to depart! It Erupts and then it slowly abates.
It is funny to see that we so easily convince ourselves that yes we are in love. The root cause of the tensions ahead. And these roots play a very important part, part when your eruption abates.
When thing go calm in you, the decision that you have to make of knowing that can you live without that person or not. Once taken, Smiles can be back on both the faces.
But then, that's another calculation. (If Aishwarya Rai says a NO to Abhishek Bachchan, i can imagine him peeing in his underwear like a crying dick all his life).

Its tough to ask yourself where do you want to stop, or ever if you want to. What is that thing which makes you leave one and go to another..? As if you couldn't have been able to survive with that.

Well coming back to the Boy and the Girl at the top who just started with something...
Boy - I long to be with you baby,
I want you to be mine.
(Period)

Girl - Then why don't you take me in your arms dear,
Why don't you let our bodies love twine?
Your body your touch creeps me sweetly,
How can this stupid girl in me ever decline..?
(Period)

Kya Yahi Pyaar Hai..? :)
Go find your answers.

Fresh Air, Happiness, and Ofcourse, The Newness in Sadness!

More than a year that this heart wanted to write. Of Stories, characters, Heroes and Villains that passed by.
It feels great to be back here and writing.

I never knew the key to success but indeed the recent past that i had dealt with has taught me the key to failure, and which is to 'please everybody around'. It so happens, not just with me, but again i say, i am more concerned about myself.

The year and a half that rushed by, is and was my career pick up.
And yet again, when people are busy becoming good associates tagging their appraisals, i stick to my career objectives strongly.
Which was to believe in friendships and live by them. I have attained a few milestones, and lost a number too!

But so is life. I know if i want to earn money and leave people behind when i am 40, i can do that.
But if i leave my friends for something other, there is no coming back when i am 40 (or less or beyond)!

This is what i have always believed in, and will, come what may!

And yeah, it feels grreaatttt to be back.
I promise to post something 'logical' for the one who follows! :)

Chuck Out! Yeah. Like, Actually :)

Thanks again to some of my 'Friends'. I forgot they all are the 'same'.
Yeah, its easy to fall when a girl cries.
And if that friend is reading this out, yeah, its you man!

Sadly, the whole story falls in pieces one day.
'What goes around, comes around'.

That's what just happened..? Don't you realize this..?
In your face, 'What went around girl, just came back around - To You!'.

I have no fear, and no emotion.
For i have played my part 'WELL'.

Sad, some people can never stand their mistakes.

Go 'people' live your life in a peace, and yeah, let me do the same.
And to that friend, dude!...friends stick to each other but sadly you had your own definition!

Forget it, because i just Forgot you!

Bye Bye! :D

i am afraid, happy.

Life since this January has been the biggest change I have ever felt. I have turned into someone i never thought of.

 Happy..? I don't know. Sad..? Definitely NOT.

I had felt and lived that overrated 'LONELY' life for sometime now, never knew it was so awesome :)

There are some people i have missed badly all through this while. And i am only going to miss them more, as i know there is NO looking back.

I some how now have a despaired and this Slain look. No, I didn't invite dark circles, i didn't wanted to lose weight. But its all done.  :)

I have a body minus soul, which is cracking abruptly.

This is what makes me 'afraid'. 

Living life this way, was never so much fun before. 

My room has kilos of smoke by 4 in the morning, and believe me, by God, it looks amazing.

 There is now a scratch in the head, when i think of a better life (the one i am living now)

who's to plan, my plan of the plans..?
who's to decide that this life i lead is dead, or alive..?

I am so much happy, that i have no one to lead me. This is what it is to 'live your life, your way'.

'No one can define, your wrongs and your rights.

No one can define, your Wars, your fights!'

I guess one life is all i have, and i'll live it the way i believe in living it.

But to sacrifice and live without your own avowal, is a fate worst than dying.

And so i know a place i need to be, 

where it is not wrong, to live sinfully! 

I am finally moving out to Bombay, having keys to my own Flat.
(That is the place i need to be, where it is not wrong to live sinfully)

Pun intended indeed ;)
and this is what makes me happy. 

I will continue living this life (since january wali) :D

Kaan Ke Parde Mein Ched! :(

I am deaf with one ear, it hurts!
the proverb - 'Ek kaan se suno, aur doosre se nikalo' works no longer for me. :(
only if the operation (which may/may not happen)  goes well, i shall be hearing you properly.

what could have been right..?

'They Push me away from what could have been right..?'

Sadly, twp people could not 'Kill' it forever, and now that i did, it could have been right..? :)

A 'Love Triangle' may sound cool no doubts, but is a bore in real. Sorry, for i could not maintain the triangle.

Oh, and i guess i will take admission in a B.B.A section IN AMITY (you know its hard to leave my college), and never give time to my loved ones.

Crux - If two people can remain the same, so can I.

:)

I saw her today, with naman and i guess(gaurav).
and then i felt saying 'HI' to Shashank!

So, Hi shashank, how are you..?
Shashank - i am good brother (as usual)

and the lines goes dead!

:)

Can i go fuck on my own..? [[Stay Away]]

True, i am irritated.

And i guess walking away would be the best. Not that i am a coward, but i want to. People i know, sadly Suck!
(except few of the very few).

I hate to see things i am seeing now. With a mountain top of happiness, and a vertical drop of sorrows, this is it!

I now want things and people MY WAY. 

I will fake with perfection, with a smile on face. But i will bitch inside of how ugly your character is(when i meet you).

I don't feel like meeting you all now, not a bit. 

Alright, i promise i will not. (So you run lucky, i will not bitch about you now) 

i will never say i love you, and don't want to hear in return of how much you do. 

This belief of ' There is no such GOD' is helping me in a way. I never did, never will. GOD is only a 'character' for me, who thinks to be a smart ass. No Comments, but i shall have the better ass one day.

P.S - 

Fuck Dog!-(God)

Fuck You- Family, Friends.(subtract some)

Almost in ALL conversations [Not Just the Last]!

Boy - Hey, please baby, never talk to 'him', for it will ONLY create something bad.
Girl - i will NEVER talk to him, no matter what.

(Same)Boy - i came to know that you are talking to him, for the past few months.
(Same)Girl - Yes i am, and i didn't tell you, because you would never understand.


Last Conversation:
She said - But I still love you.
He said - I really need to go and smoke.


As if i was left with options. Atleast this soul smokes a non-living (a cigarette).
Unlike some people, who smoke the 'present' and the 'Ex' together! 


P.S -  He - Jatin.
         She - His dream girl.
         Him - His dream girl's Ex.




and now i DO need to go puff again! :)

You, have made my soul bleed. There was a time when my body only showered tears. Tears of grief, of loud emotional utterance! I was pushed back and strapped. Fearing the unknown future, I wasn't able to accept what was happening to me. I never protested against all the wrongs you did to me, casing my weakness for you. I believed in you..i always did! I had submitted to the most outrageous and humiliating demands, proving my faith for you. But what the fuck was i really thinking..? were you a goddess, a divinity or a supernatural being..? No..i get it here..you were a worldly bitch, an acquisitive and covetous bitch!

But time has now healed my wounds. Only after your judgement i was able to judge myself i my light.. of what life has been around me. it wasn't good at all.. even a bit. i screwed my education, my family, but i won't regret. It was indeed you who educated me my dear! because of you, i now know in whom to trust. your actions have been my best lecturer. With you i have shared some of the sad moments, to one of the saddest ever!Right--no happiness! I almost killed myself. But now i am free,as free as a bird. You gave me strength and my very own identity. 
I have known now when to fight for what i hold true, even against my near and dear. what happens to you is non of my concern now, for i have learned how to not care about people. At this friday night, I make a resolution.I will not acknowledge this hurt any more. I will never tell anyone, even myself that i have had a knife in my chest. It is as much part of me as the heart itself.

Yes.. i am beyond you now and there is nothing good left to burn!

Moment of Truth!

When u turn 21, you can look back at your life and take a bag full of learnings and lessons. Now that its my turn to look back, I see people who are just like me. They have a good college life, good friends enjoying each moment as a bliss!

But I am not a part of such world anymore. I lost everything, be it coz of my own deeds or whatever, but now in the end I am standing alone with a yawp at those people whom I thought would stay beside me, come may what, turning my life into a living paradise.

Whose fault is it anyway if the world never fuses with my thoughts..?

I would say no one’s mistake.

And this is how this nasty, mean world moves. It will always strike you in your ass the moment you rise.

But I have had enough of this ass whipping! I have had my share of depression killing me each moment inside, turning me into someone who I never was(or could imagine to be!).

This is no sudden change that I am mentioning here, it has come with time, but now its here, its here to stay!

There are people standing(whom I thought are my own) to screw me, to drill my ass down, but I am not submitting myself to them this time so easily!

A Common Thought!

What do you need from this life..? love, friendships, etc; or rather I should say..dil, dosti etc(sound better!), so if the bad time comes, you have people to listen to you, and your lover’s shoulder to cry upon.

But now I am fucking alone. When I am in problem, I am the one at my own rescue!

Sounds ugly, but that’s true! In dil dosti and etc, I am the etc!

I just need some love, some good friends..that is all I long for.

But wait my dear, the lines above show the soft part of me..the usual Jatin. The only problem is that I fucking hate him now. I will pull him out and fucking slaughter him.

I want to kill the weak in me, I don’t need a fucking soul to please me!

Every now and then,, there are people who come up to me and ask me if I am doing good, and what all is going in my mind, and want me to share it with them. I say FUCK YOU!

I had spend my entire life till date making people weld with me, but the outcome..? (better not to be even mentioned!)

I no more run for happiness, neither will I wait for it.

Its time, that I want my time….alone!

People say—“ Jatin, why do you think negative..?”

I say—“ it’s official now”

People say—“why don’t you talk..?”

I say—“even if I talk, you will never understand me”

People say—“ Man, you think too much!”

I say—“you fucking moron, you breathe too much!”

People say—“ Stop dreaming”

I say—“ you FUCK OFF!”

Choose your love, choose your enemy, choose a career for urself, choose your own bed of roses, choose to love or lust, choose a Mc aloo tikki, or a chicken Mcgrill,

Choose your own world, and go choose your life!

That’s what everyone does.

You go choose a life, but today, I Choose Myself!

Peace out!

a dickhead of a poem to relate your college life!

my first day in college,
how frightened was I

Eishhh--facing the seniors,
and what about the strict teachers!

Knew nothing about the technical stuff,
but i did learn after a few tries! (did i..?) :P

Everyone wanted to chop my hair,
everyone laughed at my malai (my milk fat! :-< )

just couldn't shield against ragging,
coz i had no wings to fly!

Never stared at girls(eheh!)
and never said a Hi(haha!)

and then i saw a number of couples,
who hand in hand went singing by

i still know a lot many idiots,
to whom i call 'aur-bhai'!


now i can write more and more,
but have to shave, so i have to go to my Nai(my billu BARBER!)

Please, don't wrap me in white!

When i am done, don't wrap me in white. Its too dull.
Atleast for now i am making an effort, sincere effort to appear bright n chirpy. Any bright color would do!. Only roses. Let there be a distinct scent that comes on me, adorn me with roses! The aroma of health and prosperity emitted over a dead, departed soul.. 

Dress me in whatever may dad says is the best. Just make sure they are bright. Let my friends put it on me.  
Don’t keep me at home once i am still. Put me in the morgue over night. Yes i will take a day till i turn to ashes, I know people who love me will take a while to come down. I know my friends will be inconsolable! 
but once i am done, no matter where i am, take me down to my home.. Lucknow... I want to turn to ashes there.  

No place else in this entire world!

Men don't Despair!

I fail to understand all the noise media is making about not needing men anymore just because a few scientists have discovered how to create human sperms from stem cells now.

Now how does that make a man redundant?

Please don’t get me wrong here, a man can certainly be an object of pleasure for a woman, but this pleasure I am talking about, extends beyond the bed! Yes, it does!

We frequently come across this question of what life would be without women..? 

lets just put all the women on hold here. The question now is, what life would be without men here?

I pity women who say that they don’t need a man for anything; there are untold pleasures these women have yet to discover! 

And once again, I am not talking sex here. Well, not just.And even if we talk sex, how does that boil down to just sperms? Now just come to think of it that every time a man and a woman come together for sex, how many times are relevant sperm-wise? The average couple may have 2 children, and sex say twice a week, making it 104 times a year and so around 3,120 times for an average marriage span of 30 years. In all these romps, the sperm is relevant just twice, or lets say eight more times, taking in account all the failed attempts. Now this account for just 0.3 percent of their total sex life.

And now they say that the artificially created sperm makes men redundant. What crap! 
Who says creation of lab sperms can make men redundant? Babies or no, women need men for qualities beyond the bed! ( a bit of reality check)

He is Forever. :-(

He can please any girl. He won’t even leave girls in the night. For he has no fear that girls may desert him. He’s forever. Hold him up girls and then caress, touch, stroke and undress him. I am sure the feel will be supreme, ultimate, unparalleled. You can see every part, and nothing hides in the heart to hurt! I wish I was that HE. I wish I was Diamond! :->

with Love, to Love, for Love!

Hmm, looking for love, or I may say looking for someone to love you..? Are you still searching..patiently? [ Wow..you got balls!(Fireballs)] :P Well i am not here to start any dating agency as I am just NOT good at it! Actually, according to me, this is not they way to find love..is it..? You find people, but not love. They are two different things. For now..lets have some coffee, as “A lot can happen over a coffee” :P (another way of NOT finding your love) :->

lights, camera, and RAPE!

Two of the 11 men arrested for the alleged gang rape of a 24-year old MBA student near a mall in Noida. . . A 40-year old woman was allegedly gangraped by four men, including her husband's friend. . . . and the list goes on! "Their minds are rotten". In many cases the family and acquaintances are often rapists including fathers, uncles, and cousins. The sad thing about the evil practice in India is the lack of seriousness with which the crime is often treated. Statistics from 2000 showed that on an average, every hour has a different rape story in india. Delhi is not only the country capital, but the "rape capital" as well with over 330 cases in 4 months! dude..its time for me to wear my body condom. 


Capital isn't safe..but hey, i promise to be rubber sheltered! :->

19th January!

"Don't keep him waiting child! Why,his time is worth a thousand pounds a minute! And don't twiddle your fingers all the time..Better say nothing at all. 
Language is worth a thousand pounds a word!" The goat has a self-made brick wall around him. He's shy, but he is strong and tough. He's pleasant, but he's fiercely ambitious. Like the legendary, silent, earthy cowboy, the goat seems to prefer to be alone! They prefer to discuss serious subject, however, will always be there to listen to the problem. tend to be dominating and are not easy to win over. If you are going on a date with the goat (haha), make sure you are prompt! If you say you'll be there at a certain time, be there. They are intolerant to people who say something else and do something else. There are goats who are deliciously romantic- who understand the strange light of the moon and the glorious colors of the butterfly's wing. Don't defy the conventions if you want the respect of the goat. "PUBLIC SCENES AND RAW, NAKED, UNCONTROLLED PASSIONS EMBARRASS THEM!" ( but hey, i don't mind..hehe) Opportunity never has to knock twice at the goat's door. He'll hear the first knock. In fact, he's been leaning against the door, listening and waiting for it. phew! 

Fine, lets cut the crap now and put Linda Goodman on hold.. Happy birthday to this goat! happy birthday to me. :-)

Not too near, not too far.

There are couples who are so much into each other that there is no detail too intimate to discuss and no rule too sacrosanct to be broken. They present a united front to the world--sound like each other, repeat the same anecdotes and jokes and over time, may even start looking like each other! they know each other's deepest secrets from the past and there are no more mysteries to unravel.  

There are couples who agree to carve out enough space for each other and steer so far clear that overtime they become strangers and address the world from their own separate individual spaces, with no trace of togetherness. Over time they forget the art of communication and distance between them keeps growing.That is when they start saying, " It seems that i am living with a Stranger!". Despite talk of how important distance is for a healthy relationship, too much of it can stretch ties to breaking point, while an overdose of cloying togetherness can be nauseating! 
 
The long and short of it is that while it's important to keep a bit of yourself away just for you, it is equally important not to allow distances to grow exponentially. The most successful partnerships are those that maintain this "near-far" balance. Near enough to feel together and far enough retain the mystique!